Shaving, Spock, and Red Lipstick

So I have a little secret, I don't shave my legs or my armpits very often at all. I reserve it for special occasions or when I know I will have to show my legs in public IE swimming. It is about once a month I shave, unless it is summer which can happen maybe every other week. I am blessed with fair hair so it does not easily show up when it isn't shaved.

This is coming from a convo I had with J-Potty a couple days ago where she asked me if I had known that most girls are cleanly shaved...like EVERYWHERE! I was indeed wise to this trend but don't care much for trends, I mean they are called that and not permanents for a reason! Anyways she was feeling bad for not being one of those girls, but big sister to the rescue with the "don't worry I NEVER shave" pep talk. So the next question was obvious, well then what's with the trend. I could only at that time come up with the answer, porn. I haven't seen much, I mean like other than going to a store and bam some hooch up in my face on the cover of some very humorous DVD, or the very often Internet pop up add. Anyways from what I have seen, and this is not a very well educated or studied topic for me, porn girls are hairless. I think I read a study somewhere that said that since most people watch porn now in formative years, they feel that it is the norm and follow that into many a bad place.

Now I have shaved my legs for Kyle's work Christmas party, I know very festive of me eh? But I can't help but think of how illogical it all is. Now you are probably wondering where the whole Spock thing was going to enter, like at some point did I see some porn movie where shaved ladies were wearing Spock ears or even better were they shaving Spock himself? No. I am a HUGE Star Trek geek and one thing that I have come to love is Spock's logic, Kyle will now often times after I say something pat me on the head and tell me Spock would be proud or that he has never met a real life Vulcan before. Anyways back to the illogic of shaving. As I said I shaved my legs, they are nice and smooth and I will admit I love the feel. However upon stepping out of the bathroom I see what makes me second guess my choice. SNOW. Why would anyone in their right mind shave when it is so cold and snowy out, it is illogical. I mean hair was put on our bodies to help us to keep warm during times of cold. Why would God place it there for us to just shave off at a time when, really, we could use an extra layer. Then I thought, why is there such pressure to shave, and why did it start. There is no real purpose for it, I mean when you are "dating" why should it matter in the least that you are shaved? I mean really biologically your gender opposite is looking for things in you that would tell him you are a viable mate to procreate with, and hair on your legs has little to nothing to do with producing offspring. Quite the opposite one would think, I mean hair on the toes is a sign of good circulation and that is probably something we look for in a mate, so hairy legs could show us exactly how far circulation could be going should you have hair legs.

This also brings me to the point of I hate you people who say that you love your married companion. PUKE. I mean come on, show me some proof. There exactly you can't show me proof of love as it is an emotion which doesn't truly exist. I mean you chose the one you are with based on chemical stimulation and the biological fact that you seen something in them that made you want to procreate with them. I have yet to see dogs or cats fall in love have you? I mean the very thought is ridiculous. I tell Kyle that I love him often times, yes, but we have the understanding that I do not love him. I found him to be a suitable candidate for procreation and companionship. It is easier and shorter to say I love you than for me to tell Kyle that I have a bio-chemical reaction to him manifesting itself in great feelings of tender concern. So yeah you just think about that for a while, I mean we are nothing but animals anyways, it is illogical to think that we are any more capable of knowing love than the dog who craps in our front yard every morning!

Shaving my friends is something that some MAN (meaning mankind, not the gender) created for his own financial gain. I mean come on, give me some proof of the real need to shave. We have evolved since Neanderthal man who was hairier than us, but had little shelter or protection from the elements. We now live in climate controlled places where our hairiness isn't as needful for our survival, but we still have hair. God must have a reason for it being there or else we would have evolved further and be the hairless wonders of porn (and if they are all hairless like I am to believe, what's with the porn mustache? I mean clearly they aren't all well shaven right?).

To you nay sayers out there, leave me a comment and tell me your points, I have no reason to think your view is any less valid than mine. My last point is this, how many of you ladies out there love the rugged look on a guy, you know that sexy 5 o'clock shadow? That means they haven't shaved and we still enjoy it, so why then are there so many guys with NO hair ANYWHERE. I see them in cosmo all the time.

I will leave you with a lesson I learned from my father about makeup, specifically lipstick. He told me that red lipstick was used as a way of getting a mate, as it imitates the way blood rushes to another set of lips and would set off chemicals in the males brain that would tell him that this red lipstick female would mate with him.

Tops Never Stops Saving You More

I grew up with that jingle, as most Americans and boarder Canadians do. I never bothered thinking about Tops savings as I was a kid and none of that mattered to me. But now I am a bargain hunting adult and nothing excites me more than saving. So does Tops really never stop saving me more? Well I was there last weekend, yes black Friday included a pit stop at Tops. Word to the wise breakfast is always at Tops with the best fresh donuts, American too so you know they are bad for you. On a side note lunch is also at Tops, they have AMAZING pizza! Can you tell I haven't had lunch yet? Anyways back to a meaningful post, while I was at Tops I signed up for their Tops Bonus Card, I know Mamaz has had one for years and it just so happened not to be on her that day. Anyways it is so super simple to sign up and it doesn't matter you are Canadian. Anyways you get it right there and start saving that day! Perfect! Beautiful! But Laura you ask, is it worth the hassle of signing my name to yet another card? Well my friend I am glad you asked. Yes, yes it is worth it. I didn't buy much that day, other than I seen Doritos were buy one get one free with a Tops card. However I am now back in my chair and reading all about my new card. What do I see about the card that now is like the best card in my wallet, except for all those gift cards, I see it gets you DOUBLE THE COUPON DISCOUNT. Yes folks with this card you can double your coupon value. LOVE IT. Now I will have to find some good American coupon sites (I know of one so far, Buffalo Moms Like Me). Buy one get one free is good and all Laura, you say, but there is always a limit and I hate that. No my friend, Tops says fill your cart and make yourself and your kids happy. But is it really worth it to shop in the States? My friend Tops sells their turkeys on sale for 29 cents a pound, try to find that at your Food Basics or Sobeys. And they are GOOD turkeys too.

In short why not check out their flyers periodically and see if their savings are worth it for you and then next time you are there pop in and sign up for a card. It is free, what do you have to loose other than a couple minutes filling out a short info sheet? Plus it comes with 3 cards so share with a friend or family member to become their most valued friend.

A couple things you should add to your list even though they may sell it cheaper here?
~Oreo cookies yes they sell them here but the American ones are SO better
~Pizza Goldfish yes friends you will die and go to heaven eating these no longer sold in Canada snacks
~Kraft Dinner the American stuff tastes like the 90's before all these fat kids got all the good stuff banned in Canada
~Land O Lakes hot chocolate you can buy it in big boxes here at Costco but there is more of a selection at Tops and you better believe these are great hot chocolates